Donna Marie Jones

“Sad are the hearts that love you. Silent the tears that fall.”

Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to our ceremony today at Crewe
Crematorium, as we commemorate with sorrow but also with love, respect, joy and
thankfulness, the life of Donna Marie Jones. Today is a day for special songs,
poetry and your own poignant reflections. Even though you are still trying to
understand the tragedy of losing a beautiful woman long before you were ready to
say goodbye; we celebrate her unique character and she was most certainly unique,
the mould has been well and truly broken!
Rather than focus on what has happened, I would like you to think more about the
gifts Donna gave you during her precious time on earth, I am not referring to
presents wrapped in fancy paper and bows, I mean the memories she has left you
with: the lasting feelings you have for her, the impact of her cheeky character, her
personality, her quirky traits, her wild side, her dark side like being passionately
interested in horror movies and serial killer magazines, her love of wolves, her ability
to be a social butterfly, her incorrigible nature, her incessant laughter, her
determination to live life on her own terms regardless of whether anyone approved or
not! and the valuable life lessons she may be trying to teach you according to your
strengths.
It may be to not put off what you want to do in life, pursue your dreams, for some it
may be to not take life too seriously because you never know how brief it may be, for
others it may be to take life seriously because it is so fragile and Donna may be
challenging you all to make life more meaningful and worthwhile and then, someday,
looking back, you will see her memory, not through a tear filled cloud – but as a
beautiful light on your horizon, giving your life richness and a dimension of meaning.
When someone close to us dies, it feels like a part of you has been stolen from you,
especially when there were so many hopes and dreams to still experience together
and precious years to catch up on. Death that is too early to comprehend is the
most tragic to our minds, a death that causes the deepest emotions, so I am grateful
to Nikki, Adam, Angie and Andrew supported by Steph and Harvey for meeting with
me to bravely share their memories of Donna whilst trying to come to terms with their
grief.
Donna was a cherished mum to Nikki and Adam, sister to Brian, Angela and Andrew,
a sister-in-law to Yvonne, Harvey and Wendy and a ‘fun’ auntie to Franki and Benji,
to Jordan, Keiran and Callum and to Sarah, Stacey and Scott.
Being here together, joined in thought by those who are unable to travel, provides
support and comfort, whether members of the family or caring friends. Your
collective sorrow and grief become a collective strength, enabling you to find closure
and take the vital steps forward to facing a future without Donna.

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Our ceremony allows sorrow and sadness to surface, expressed in tears or smiles
whilst reflecting on her life and the array of emotions accompanying those memories.

Grief takes many forms yet grieving in whatever way is meaningful allows us the
serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we
can and the wisdom to know the difference.
When someone is lost to us, life ends, and memories are what we have left to
ponder. Donna no longer has a physical presence but please take comfort,
memories ensure we continue to see those we cherish in many familiar places.
It is almost impossible in the short time we have to portray all aspects of someone’s
life but today you all share a common bond, to some degree or other your lives have
all been touched by knowing Donna.
Jean and Tom welcomed their lovable rogue into the world on 10 th June 1967. She
was one of four and Angela and Andrew remember how they all shared a happy
childhood in Crewe. Even as a tiny tot, Donna was a cheeky scamp; if her mum or
dad chastised her, she gave them a ‘knowing look’, completely ignored them and
managed to stay completely defiant! If she got a smack on her bottom, she
remained determined not to cry but from what I have heard, Donna was the ‘fall guy’
she was easily led and willingly coerced into mischief by the others!
Donna was always the life and soul of any party and normally the one dancing on the
tables! She met Andy around 1990 in the Cross Keys in Crewe, they hit it off
instantly and after moving in together, Nikki was born in 1991 followed by Adam in
1996. Andy had previously lived in South Africa, so they regularly went there as a
family and whilst there in 2003, they got married.
They lived in Sandbach from around 2002 and for several years, Donna was ‘a stay-
at-home mum’. After Donna and Andy parted, she experienced some ups and
probably as many downs. She moved to Alsager then back to Sandbach where she
lived with Mike for eleven years. She did have various jobs but enjoyed working in
the kitchen at NuNu’s Nursery and had a sense of achievement and pride.
She then found work at the Kinderton Arms in Middlewich so after moving nearer to
work, her and Mike separated but remained good friends. Donna was a valued
member of the team at the pub and the family would like me to thank the Manager,
Jeanette Thompson for her continued help and support toward Donna especially
since the pandemic started. She was furloughed but Jeanette regularly kept in
touch.
I gather Donna followed many fashion trends and styles during her life like the time
she dressed as a goth, she was also a rock chick, and liked to think of herself as a
biker chick and was a member of the Last Wolf bikers.
Donna was heartbroken when she lost her mum on February 14th and having lost her
dad two years previously, it hit her hard as did the isolation that Covid has created.
I am grateful to Angela for sharing her tribute to Donna:

Reflection of Our Early Years – Angela
Sister, my sister.
Where did you go?
Born just 3 years apart. Growing up with you was so easy. We shared a bedroom.
Boy! Was Donna untidy?
Most nights we would sneak the light back on once mum and dad had put us to bed.
We would chat and giggle well into the night. We would sneak treats from the kitchen
whilst they were in the front room. One night, Donna was still in the kitchen and dad
went into make a cup of tea and she had to hide behind the fridge. He had no idea!
The only thing that gave us away was leaving a trail of raisins on the stairs for them
to find the next day.
We would play at being DJ and record the chart show from the radio. Trying to just
record the songs and stop it before the actual DJ spoke. We were rubbish. We
missed it all the time.
I was endlessly picking up your clothes and throwing them back onto your side of the
room. As a family we loved playing games. Especially the ones where dad would
end up chasing us and Donna would definitely squeal the loudest.
Donna was not very good at doing as she was told. So, it came as no surprise, when
on a school trip to Edinburgh and on an outing to Arthurs Seat all the pupils were told
to only walk on the path. No. Not Donna. She had to go her own way. Consequently,
falling down the said extinct volcano and cracking open her head. When the coach
brought the children home, Donna stepped off with a bandage wrapped around her
head.
Her love of music was quite varied. There was a time she lived for Boy George and
Culture Club. Even wore all the makeup. You can’t believe it I know!
Then almost overnight she was listening to rock bands and her beloved Bon Jovi.
You left home at 19, to get married and start your new life. And I got a tidy bedroom.
It was never the same.
In the years that passed, you loved and you lost. Yet you lived how you wanted to
and lived to the full. Your visits were few, due to busy life. We are all guilty of that.
This last few years through the sorrow and pain, we have again been able to share
some time. My children call you witchy finger – you started that! and they loved
dressing up in your rock chic clothes.
It has been tough! You had a demon on your back. It was just waiting out it’s time to
take you away.

We offered our hand to you and you held on for a while. But then you let go. The
demon came calling and you had to go.
Sister, my sister. I will think of you often.
Especially whilst picking up the clothes from my daughter’s bedroom floor.
Thank you, Angela.
Nikki would like to bravely share some thoughts about their mum.
Memories of Mum – Read by Nikki
None of my friends have a mum like our mum.
She still did all the mum things, like make our favourite packed lunches and read to
us at bedtime. She volunteered at our primary schools, and when she started
working as a nursery cook, she took the same pride in feeding other people’s
children as she did her own.
But my friend’s mums didn’t blast heavy metal out of their living room windows or
gatecrash their son’s nights out and revel in embarrassing them. Our mum proudly
called herself a MILF and wore skirts shorter than mine, she was the first to hit the
dancefloor and the last to leave the bar.
Our mum introduced us to a love for horror, for “real” music, and for being a little bit
different. She was uniquely herself and made no apologies for it.
Our mum was vibrant and caring, outgoing and friendly, she was impulsive and a
party animal, embarrassing and gullible. None of my friends have a mum like our
mum, because there’s no one else like Donna.
Thank you Nikki
Please take the next few minutes to reflect on your own thoughts whilst we play a
beautiful song in honour of Donna.
Reflective Music: Somewhere Over the Rainbow – Eva Cassidy
Poem: Miss Me but Let Me Go
When I come to the end of the road,
And the sun has set for me.
I want no rites in a gloom-filled room.
Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little – but not too long,
And not with your head bowed low.
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me – but let me go.
For this is a journey that we all must take,
And each must go alone,
It is all part of natures’s plan,
A step on the road to home.

When you are lonely and sick of heart,
Go to the friends we know,
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds.
Miss me but let me go.
(by Glyn Shipton)

Farewell
Ladies and Gentlemen, please stand.
Donna left her mark on life just by her very nature. Remember what she gave you,
remember her face, her laughter, her ups and downs as she negotiated her journey
through life, her determination and strength of character.
We tenderly and reverently commit the body of Donna Marie Jones to be cremated.
Donna, be free, be strong, be proud of who you have been, know that you will be
mourned and missed, that you have loved and are beloved. go on your journey with
love, with blessings and with the knowledge that you will always be a shining light in
the lives of your loved ones. With enduring love and respect, we bid you farewell
and, in the days, weeks and months ahead may your loved ones find strength and
support in their love for one another to enable them to find peace in their hearts and
a way to face the future without you.
Move beyond form, flowing like water, feeding on sunlight and moonlight, radiant as
the stars in the night sky. Pass the gates, enter the dark without fear, returning to
the womb of life to steep in the cauldron of rebirth. Rest and heal, reunited with your
dear parents.
Goodbye Donna
A loved one is like a pebble being thrown into a still lake, although the pebble
disappears beneath the surface, the ripples gently carry on. Just by remembering
Donna, speaking about her often, laughing about her or crying because of her, she
will remain with you.
Roses on casket
Please be seated.
To those of you left behind, “May the sun bring you energy every day, bringing light
into the darkness of your soul. May the moon softly restore you by light bathing you
in the glow of restful sleep and peaceful dreams.
May the rain wash away your worries and cleanse the hurt that sits in your heart.
May the breeze blow new strength into your being, and may you believe in the
courage of yourself. May you walk gently through the world, keeping Donna with you
always, knowing that you are never parted in the beating of your heart.”
As you leave here today, think about the hopes that Donna would have had for you.
And though she would prefer you to smile, where you weep; know that she would
forgive the grief and the sorrow you feel right now.

Grief is a very personal, unique journey. For some that journey is long; for others
brief. For some it is all consuming; and for others an un-welcome, interrupting series
of thoughts, that they try so hard to keep out.
Whatever your journey of grief looks or feels like; remember it will take as long as it
needs to take. Be patient with yourself, and of course with one another. You will all
heal at different rates.
And now as the curtains gently close, we leave Donna at rest. Thank you for
attending the ceremony today, I do hope it has given you a degree of comfort to
have shared in the opportunity of saying say a dignified farewell.
Please remain seated, the funeral director will come forward to guide you to the exit
of the chapel at the appropriate time.
Recessional Music: Who Wants to Live Forever – Queen

Donna’s funeral took place on Thursday 14th January at Crewe Crematorium.